Are they cheating on me?

Have you noticed changes in your husbands, wife’s, partners, boyfriends or girlfriends routine? Or is your intuition telling you they are cheating?

Unlike the movies, it’s rare to smell the scent of someone else’s aftershave on your wife’s clothing or notice red lipstick on your husband’s collar! However you may have noticed certain changes in their routine, secretive use of their phone or unexpected and increased work or social commitments which have you concerned. Or it could simply be your intuition telling you that your husband, wife, partner, boyfriend or girlfriend is cheating. 

We often hear from that clients that they have either noticed something suspicious or have a sinking feeling in their gut and have initially confronted their partner. When questioning them about such signs, it’s all too common for those concerns to be dismissed by a partner and the focus pushed back on them being obsessive, overthinking, crazy or similar; which of course leads to immediate self-doubt.

Our specialisation lies in investigating the behaviours of potentially unfaithful partners using a range of investigative techniques from GPS vehicle tracking to background checks and surveillance. We regularly engage with people at various stages of suspicion, from those who have witnessed infidelity first-hand to those with a regular of doubt. 

Over the years, we have identified patterns in behaviours related to breaches of trust, ranging from affairs to substance abuse. If these behaviours resonate with your situation, we recommend a confidential consultation with our team. Our team of private investigators in Auckland, Tauranga, Wellington, Christchurch and throughout New Zealand specialise in identifying these signs and providing clear insights.

Unexplained Financial Transactions: Mysterious credit card or bank transactions or regular/large cash withdrawals that are not part of your partners regular routine could be an indicator of infidelity. In our experience people involved in infidelity will try and cover their tracks, for example rather than paying for a dinner or hotel on their credit or debit card that would show on a bank statement, they’ll start withdrawing regular sums of cash to pay for such activities.

Excessive Phone/Device Use: While frequent phone use may be innocent, secretive behaviour like taking the phone to the bathroom, making excuses to use it in private, not connecting the phone to the car via Bluetooth and/or changing passwords for devices raises concerns. Defensiveness about phone privacy can be a red flag.

Changes in Work Routine: Genuine reasons for increased work hours exist, especially during busy periods. However, unusual claims of overtime, meetings running late, earlier starts that don’t fit in with your partners regular schedule, may warrant further investigation. The classic “travel for work” excuse can be genuine, but signs like packing their favourite outfits or lingerie, spending an unusual amount of time deciding which outfits to pack or inconsistent details about where they are going, staying or the timetable of work events may suggest otherwise.

Unusual Social Events: An increase in social events that don’t involve you or any of your partners close friends, such as after work drinks with colleagues or going to a “friend of a friends” birthday could be cause for concern. Deliberate vagueness and/or avoidance of discussing the night out either before or after the event are potential indicators of suspicious behaviour. 

Increased Gym Attendance: While adopting a healthier lifestyle is commendable, sudden and prolonged hours at the gym without tangible results might just be a cover. Look for indicators like no sweaty gym clothing and gym towels or a consistent lack of post-exercise exhaustion.

 

While individual signs alone might have innocent explanations, a combination of them raises suspicion. Trust your instincts and, if needed, seek help from the Trojan team so that we can gather the evidence you need. 

We offer confidential consultations without financial obligation and if helpful, you’re welcome to speak with our female private investigator about your situation. 

In challenging times, our team provides clarity through meticulous private investigation processes. Our expertise, your peace of mind.